It Ain't
Murray
Peter: [walks in and plops
down on the couch next to Ray] What's this, no Murray the
Mantis today?
Ray: No, they have this
strange cartoon on today, which pre-empted Murray. [grumble,
grumble]
Peter: Who's that guy? The
short, chubby red-haired one who's hugging everyone to
death?
Ray: He's a walking
Teletubbie, ain't he? Sickening, that's what it is.
Peter: And what's with the
one with the brown hair and the huge, green eyes? He's
fawning all over the blond guy, who
looks gay as a parade, I might add.
Ray: You think that's bad,
check out the last guy; he doesn't do anything but drive the car,
and say, "Good Golly Miss Molly!" a lot. They should just kill
him off.
Peter: Who's the old bag?
Damn, she has more wrinkles than a Shar-Pei dog!
Ray: That's She-La, the
Malignant Queen of the Platonic Gonad Warriors; that's those
other four guys. You see, she pushed out the Good Queen and took over,
making the Gonad Warriors do stupid and
insipid things, like hug each other a lot.
Peter: Why don't you change
the channel?
Ray: I'm hoping the Good
Queen will return, and kill off She-La once and for all…wait,
there she is!
Peter: The feisty red-headed
chick?
Ray: Yeah, that's Jah-Neen,
Queen of the Land of Ayche-Cue, who wants to settle down
with the blond Gonad Warrior, but She-La interfered by casting a spell,
making all the Gonad Warriors fawn all over
each other and ignore all other women
entirely.
Peter: That's sick! Doesn't
the old crone know that guys need women in their lives? This is unnatural; just
what is this show trying to teach our youth nowadays? I'm
calling the station and protesting!
Ray: Wait,
Jah-Neen is rallying! Look at her go! She really wants her blond boyfriend
back.
[Ray and Peter
watch as Jah-Neen runs over the Malignant Queen, She-La, with the pink royal
coach.]
Ray and Peter:
YAY!
Peter: Now the kingdom will be back to normal?
Ray: It sure seems so—oh, crap, She-La had a ringer waiting in the wings. It's
her evil sycophant henchman, Liu-Cee,
Hater of Truth and Knowledge. Crumbs, it looks like
Lui-Cee is gonna drag She-La off to some hidden evil lair and resurrect her.
Peter: This show blows; what's on the Playboy Channel?
Ray: Nekkid chicks, what else?
[Both Peter
and Ray smile wickedly at each other, then eagerly change the channel.]